Spanking, the Great Debate

Should parents spank their kids?

  • Yes, always

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • Yes, depending on what the child did

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • No, never. Supply an alternative.

    Votes: 0 0.0%

  • Total voters
    0

Decadent_Irises

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Hey~
let's resuscitate this debate. with this.
 

Berserk

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Total D-bag wrote:
"If I could burn that paddle in my stove," Nixon says, "I would. This is the worst part of my job."
It's so gosh-darn horrible that he's publicizing it! And basing the school's disciplinary code on it!

Lets give him the gold-fucking-medal in mental gymnastics for that one :|
"I know if I got [paddled at school]," Nathan says, "my mom would whip me, too."
Wonderful. Real bang up job yer doin' down there, S.C. :|


Maybe I'm overreacting, but seriously ::hora::
 

holylampposts

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Decadent_Irises wrote:
Hey~
let's resuscitate this debate. with this.
Is that in this week's newsweek? I hate reading long articles online, but if it's in the magazine, I'll go to barnes and noble and check it out
 

Decadent_Irises

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holylampposts wrote:
Decadent_Irises wrote:
Hey~
let's resuscitate this debate. with this.
Is that in this week's newsweek? I hate reading long articles online, but if it's in the magazine, I'll go to barnes and noble and check it out
umm yeah it's in the mag :D

it's certainly an interesting debate lol
 

Duality

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I'll just add my pennies.

I was spanked as a kid. Alot, however, there was one punishment that made me stop dead in my tracks.

In my household, the flow of punishment went like this:

Verbal warning>Spanking>"The Look."

I only got "The Look" twice and it scared me straight! I knew that if I got spanked I would be one step away from mental anguish.

Seriously, when my mom would look at me that way, it would just freak me out. Like she was going to kill me, burn me, freak out. o_o;

And oddly enough, I am EXTREMELY close to my mom. And she was the one who did all the punishing.

I hope I get to instill fear into my kids one day. ^_^
 

Decadent_Irises

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Duality wrote:
Seriously, when my mom would look at me that way, it would just freak me out. Like she was going to kill me, burn me, freak out. o_o;
actually i had the same type of situation when i was little! my mom loves this quote i said when she freaked me out. apparently i was like "Mommy no big eyes! no big eyes!"... because whenever she gave me that look, her eyes got kinda buggy. XDD
 

Iskanderia

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There's a very thin line between moms who give you "that look" and moms who are fuckin' crazy and will beat you half to death. I'm of the opinion that if you've never dealt with straight up crazy ass abusive moms than you probably have no idea what actual abuse feels like.

Basically, if you've been ABUSED than you know you have been. But if you've just been kind of lightly spanked and bossed around than I'm guessing that you don't really have any idea what actual child abuse feels like and only think that you do.

PS. A lot of people in this thread have apparently experienced real abuse to more or less extent. (no offense to Irises above me, because seriously, you've dealt with some scary stuff too obviously.)
 

Haku

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flowersofnight wrote:
holylampposts wrote:
And I really, truly, don't think that parents should only talk about the misdeed with their kids, because if talking is all that happens, kids will eventually zone parents out.
Depends what kind of talking! In Japan, mothers shame their misbehaving children, like "What would other people think of this" and similar.
I'm really not making this up.

My mother 'shames' me into doing stuff, quite literally. Now, it demotivates me because I taught myself into thinking for myself and to not be effected by what people say about me. After all, she's just using me as a trophy daughter and nothing more, and I really don't appreciate that. =P Especially when I'm being compared to my younger cousins (with mothers who have different parenting styles, might I add).

But back to the point; Spanking is acceptable in some cultures, but not in the society i'm living in. For example, Spanking is a norm in the Philippines, and everyone experiences it, so there is no social stigma. Spanking in North America shapes the child differently, because they are socialized in school and by the media differently.

Personally, I'm more likely to listen to my father than I am my mother, not because i'm afraid my dad will smack me (he never has,) but because I respect my dad and I feel incredibly guilty for doing something bad, because he's just such a cool guy and he doesn't deserve to feel bad or be responsible for something I've done. For me, that's punishment enough.

If I do something bad, actually, I'm more scared of what my mother would say, because she would just make me feel worse than I already do, and that would de-motivate me from doing better, because she doesn't appreciate/take into account for long, the positive things I do. My reward for doing something good is silence, and my punishment for doing something bad is an earful of stuff I seriously don't need to hear. X_x

Back to the point again. @_@ Spanking only makes sense as a punishment until about middle school. After that, it would just be humiliating, and by then the child would realize consequences anyway...
 

Stan

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When I was little my Mom used to 'hit me lightly' and use a belt sometimes to teach me some discipline I guess. Only a few times did I ever really get bruises and some open gashes. Never got spanked though o.o . But if I would have I don't know... The result of those hits...I don't know if my current self right now was shaped because of that. But I grew up to be a little warped I guess? xD Aw, well. Not complaining. (What I think shaped me to be the way I am the most is my religion, music, tv, and comp.).

What I DO know when I was little was that I would tremble and get scared to death when my Mom would threaten to do that. Sometimes I would beg her to stop because as a kid, even the lightest of things make you terrified! (At least for me). Now when my Mom tries to hit me or something I either take it seriously or try to fight back xD"

I don't know what to pick x.x
 

sailorKa

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I voted for "NEVER"... I was mostly physically abused by my father when I was a kid but emotionally I'm so detached from my mother than I still prefer(and preferred) my father over her.

She'd usually just take out her belt and whip me all over with it :mad:
my father did worse... and still, I hated more my mother for it(and still do).

so I dunno. I'll try not to spank my kids ever. Specially not in public. That sort of thing is so embarrassing.


--k
 

Einherjer

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spanking isn't really violence
but beating is
there is a large difference
 

clockworkkei

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I voted for the second option. I think that spanking is lazy parenting, and that with a little thought, you can come up with other punishments that actually teach kids something. And rewarding them for good behavior is way more effective for getting them to behave than any punishment will ever be. The only time I think it's good to spank kids is when they are putting their lives in danger and need to stop immediately or get hurt worse than a spanking. Like if they're running into the street or playing with the stove. Then spank them to let them see how serious it is, and after make sure to explain to them why they got spanked and why they can't do things like that.

By the way, I was raised in a household where we were spanked but not abusively and we turned out fine. I just learned a lot more from the times I was punished in other ways, or rewarded for the good things I did.
 
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